Behavior Has Meaning

Behavior Has Meaning:

3 Steps for understanding and responding to challenging behavior

Adapted from Zero To Three National Center for Infants, Toddlers and Families

Biting

Observe

What happened before the bite?

Learn

Teething or meeting a need for oral stimulation?

Frustrated? Angry?

Defending a toy?

Protecting his space?

Respond

Offer objects the child can safely bite and chew.

Offer crunchy foods.

Provide simple words: “No” “I want.”

Say firmly, “No biting, biting hurts.”

Offer “safe space” with books, quiet toys, where the child can regroup.

Tantrums/Managing Reactions

Observe

What was happening right before the tantrum?

Are there patterns in the child’s tantrums?

Are there certain situations that trigger them?

Learn

What might be casing the child’s loss of control?

Frustration, Unable to do something, not enough language to express his thoughts/feelings, irritability due to hunger or fatigue

Respond

Stay calm.

Stay close by and keep child safe.

Validate the child’s feelings: “You are really having a hard time.  Everyone needs a break sometimes.”

Afterward tell him what a good job he did calming down.

Inconsolable Crying

Observe

What usually prompts the crying?

What usually works to console the child?

Learn

Is the child feeling:

Sick? Tired or hungry?

Sad or mad? Why?

Overwhelmed by stimuli (light/sound/touch) in the room.

Sad and crying for no clear reason.

Respond

Soothe a baby with swaddling, rocking, murmuring.

Rub baby’s back or tummy: try infant massage.

Take the child outdoors.

Get help if you are feeling frustrated and need a break.

Separation

Observe

How do the parent and child separate?

(Does the parent say a quick good-bye or linger?)

How does the child react to separations?

Learn

What is the child’s temperament?  Is change hard for her in general?

Does the child feel safe in group care? Has she bounded with a caregiver and other children?

Respond

Ask parent to be upbeat when separating and to avoid lingering or showing worry when saying good-bye.

Have the child bring a “lovey” for comfort.

Play peek-a-boo games.

Show the child laminated photos of family.

Remind the child that, “Daddy/Mommy always comes back…”

Socially Withdrawn

Observe

Does the child play with any other children?

Can the child play with others if teacher helps get the interaction going?

Does the child seem content to play on his own or does he seem sad or depressed?

Learn

Is the child:

Shy? Fearful?

Depressed?

Having difficulty using language to communicate?

Learning English as a second language?

Respond

Put what you think the child is feeling into words: “you want to help Marco build the castle.”

Help the child begin to play near and connect with other children who may be a good fit for him. 

Offer activities that do not require a lot of interaction, such as art.